Been a While...Yet again!!!
It never ceases to amaze me at how time flies. It seems like just yesterday I was loading up the cars and driving away from Mississippi to Florida to begin the next chapter of my life. Yet here I am, over three months later...two months into a job and almost three weeks as a civilian. A LOT has happened between then and now. Moved to a new state, moved into a new house, realized a close friend wasn't exactly what they appeared to be nor where they up to what they claimed they were up to, beginning a new job as a contractor, adjusting to civilian life and lastly officially becoming a civilian. Now I am in the process of trying to adjust my mind set and realize that I am no longer a part of the military and that I am a regular civilian. Part of me realizes that but a part of my mind hasn't quite let that go and I find myself very often still thinking I am. I am not sure if its because after being in for a third of my life, that my mind hasn't fully wrapped around the idea or if its part of me isn't ready to let go of that belongingness. Either way, it has been a roller coaster of events, thoughts, feelings, emotions, etc.
All that brought to a screatching halt yesterday by one event...yes, Steve Jobs death. Three months have past and it doesn't feel like it. Time has just flown by as I have been working and getting other affairs done and in order. I haven't really taken a lot of time to just sit and enjoy the moment, try enjoying my freedoms as a civilian and the realization that my weekends are my weekends and I am not having to worry about being called in, that they are mine to do what I want and go where I want as long as I am back at work Monday. You would think the car accident a month and half ago would have me stopping and taking a step back then, but with so much to do I just shook it off and kept pressing.
For a year and half I have been researching Apple, their products and Steve Jobs because I am in the process of swapping all electronics that I can over to Apple and wanted to be sure I was making a good choice. After so much reading and researching this last year and half, I actually felt sad when I heard Steve had passed. I don't usually get sentimental over celebrity deaths, but having the realization of how that one single man has affected the entire world and how we go about conducting business today, I did get sad. Then I did take a step back and realize yet again, in one second it all can be gone. Now, I do live with that thought everyday as I am also plagued by thoughts of Afghanistan and the ambush I experienced there. Yet I have learned how to push it aside so I can keep going through my daily life as normal as possible and try to hide the jumps and startles I go through everyday. Yet everyonce in a while, something happens that brings it all to the front of my brain again, and Steve Jobs death did that.
In one second, it can all be gone from us. How will we be remembered? How will our families remember us? As caring and always there, or always gone and working, or a healthy mix of both? How will our friends remember us, as dependable and always there when needed or distant and always working?
This weekend I do have some things to do. I have to get my drivers lisence rescanned, oil changed in my car and a few minutes of configuring my computer so my Majic Jack will keep working and mow my lawn. Aside from that, I am taking rest of weekend to slow down and do fun things and just relax. Put my sons dresser together with him and take the family to Baja Fresh for dinner. I plan on enjoying this weekend with them because who knows if there is another Monday for me.....
All that brought to a screatching halt yesterday by one event...yes, Steve Jobs death. Three months have past and it doesn't feel like it. Time has just flown by as I have been working and getting other affairs done and in order. I haven't really taken a lot of time to just sit and enjoy the moment, try enjoying my freedoms as a civilian and the realization that my weekends are my weekends and I am not having to worry about being called in, that they are mine to do what I want and go where I want as long as I am back at work Monday. You would think the car accident a month and half ago would have me stopping and taking a step back then, but with so much to do I just shook it off and kept pressing.
For a year and half I have been researching Apple, their products and Steve Jobs because I am in the process of swapping all electronics that I can over to Apple and wanted to be sure I was making a good choice. After so much reading and researching this last year and half, I actually felt sad when I heard Steve had passed. I don't usually get sentimental over celebrity deaths, but having the realization of how that one single man has affected the entire world and how we go about conducting business today, I did get sad. Then I did take a step back and realize yet again, in one second it all can be gone. Now, I do live with that thought everyday as I am also plagued by thoughts of Afghanistan and the ambush I experienced there. Yet I have learned how to push it aside so I can keep going through my daily life as normal as possible and try to hide the jumps and startles I go through everyday. Yet everyonce in a while, something happens that brings it all to the front of my brain again, and Steve Jobs death did that.
In one second, it can all be gone from us. How will we be remembered? How will our families remember us? As caring and always there, or always gone and working, or a healthy mix of both? How will our friends remember us, as dependable and always there when needed or distant and always working?
This weekend I do have some things to do. I have to get my drivers lisence rescanned, oil changed in my car and a few minutes of configuring my computer so my Majic Jack will keep working and mow my lawn. Aside from that, I am taking rest of weekend to slow down and do fun things and just relax. Put my sons dresser together with him and take the family to Baja Fresh for dinner. I plan on enjoying this weekend with them because who knows if there is another Monday for me.....
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